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Diariesofafatass.com

Withdrawls

2/7/2013

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I'm glad to say I've been feeling a lot better the pastcouple of days.  This doesn't mean
my identification with the self esteem issues from the show have changed.  It means I don't feel it to that extent
every day.  Thank God....



So, I'm off the one antidepressant now.  I took my last pill on Tues.  The weaning process was okay.  I had some downs, but I don't know if that had to do with getting off of them or not. The plan is to start getting off the one I've been on for quite some time next week.  I'm supposed to go to one pill, every other day.  Anyway, that was a great plan, but somehow I LOST my prescription bottle of the one.  I hadn't taken one since Mon. evening.  Every day I keep thinking I'll find them.  I've torn just about everything apart looking for them.  But holy hell I started feeling the effects of not taking them last night.  Talk about freak out.  Not like being crazy, but like my body was freaking out.  I kept getting this pulsating/shocking feeling all yesterday (seriously like 50 times).  It kept on today, and I sat in my office and couldn't find anything on my desk.  My brain was so scattered.  I called the pharmacy when they opened and got one pill, and within an hour, my body started to respond.  Even this horrible itching I'd had all over my body the past couple of
days (which I'd attributed to the extremely cold weather), went away. So...I'm not looking forward to the weaning process on this one.  Crazy.... Well, anyway I'll try tearing apart my house again tonight to find that bottle, but knowing me...I probably threw it away or it's in the freezer somewhere.  Most likely I recycled the full bottle while going through all the pills the other day.  I swear whenever I used to misplace something of value, I'd immediately think someone stole it (which is funny, since that's hardly happened to me), but now when I can't find something..I start to wonder about what crazy place I put it. 
If I don't find it, insurance won't cover it, since they just had..and they are crazy expensive.  Keeping my fingers crossed.  While not holding out much hope ;)

My diet is still shit, but life has kind of been one day at a time lately.  And each day has been a bit better.  Hoping to make the jump to feeling fantastic soon....really, I'm ready for it...  Sleep has been a ton better the past two nights, which is a God send.  I slept 2-4 hours most nights last week (all broken up) and that was simply a killer.  Sleep might be the most important thing in my overall health.

Tomorrow is Friday.  Thank the good Lord above.  

Much Love,

Jen

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    Jen

    Age 46
    Married 22 years
    2 boys, 16 & 14
    email: diariesofafatass@gmail.com


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