Are you all done with your shopping? Because we live thousands of miles from most of the people we love….. I’m always forced to shop a little early. I need time to get everything boxed up and shipped out, so it arrives on time. I spent nearly the whole day last Sunday, wrapping and boxing. Seriously, there are 28 people on my Christmas list. We both come from big families, so the number has gotten a little out of hand over the years, plus I have a couple of friends I love to buy for. It can all be overwhelming, but for the most part, I really do enjoy shopping for their gifts. There are a few things that make my heart smile, thinking of how those gifts might make that person feel. I truly do love Christmas, and I try to be in the spirit, but it really is so hard being so far from everyone. There are always some blue moments, but they don’t last long, as Brian, myself and the boys, do have each other. That’s what matters most.
Life has been unbelievably busy lately, as I’m sure it has been with you, too. It’s just that time of year. In addition to the craziness, my job duties are changing. It was the strangest thing….I had a review (just the time of year they do them – as I have only really been here 4 months) the day before I went to Florida. It went really, really well. The day I returned from Florida, we were all pulled into a meeting by our boss, saying we were all now going to report to someone else, and our job duties are changing. It seem nuts to me that we weren’t all told of this during our review or the new manager wasn’t brought in, but I guess everyone has their way of doing things. I guess we all get paid the same amount of money in a day, despite what we do. When having a desk job gets to me too much, I look at a little sticky note that says how much I make in a day. I’m there to provide for my family, and not because I’m fulfilled by what I do. Maybe one day that will change, but for now, I’m happy to have a job that contributes to keeping a roof over our head. I also do work with some pretty cool people, and am lucky enough to have found my little tribe. I do still miss my old coworkers a ton, though. I still hear from some of the guys, and it always make me happy. One of them recently reached out to tell me he got engaged, and how he did it. I’m over the moon for them, and feel blessed that he thought to tell me.
In addition to work, Caleb has two swim meets a week. He is so into it, and I couldn’t love it more for him. He also has two-a-day practices, which means super early drop offs in the morning and pickups from practice at night. I have physical therapy 2x week and now therapeutic massage once a week, so thank God Ryne can drive – because I wouldn’t be able to do many of the therapies without his help. Oh, and I have head shrink therapy, often once a week. You’d think with all of this attention, I would be Wonder Woman by now, right? Ha…. It has all been a frustrating ride, but as promised, I really had it kicked up a notch this week. I’m really hoping I start to see some results. It sure would be nice to be able to raise my arms past my shoulders or turn my neck more. With the change in p/t and adding the massage, I really think I’ll start to see improvement in just a few weeks.
I’ve still got anxiety, but some days aren’t as bad as last week. I’m heading in the right direction, and hoping it will soon be a thing of the past. I’m way over-eating, although there had been some better days in there, and I’ve been drinking shit tons of water. I’ll always wish I could handle things better, but I think I’m am improving in how I deal with some of it.
I hope you have a wonderful week and are able to enjoy the moment of it all – instead of feeling all of the pressure of obligations, finances, etc. We just have to keep reminding ourselves of what it is all about. Remember, to take care of yourself first. You’re worth it.