Hello, there. I wanted to let you know I appreciate your comments while I've been gone. It's nice to know that you believe in me and support me, even when I can't seem to do it for myself.
I've been eating like crap lately, and drinking soda. It's pathetic. It's embarrassing. I want to get back to it, and I honestly don't know why I keep shitting the bed. I don't even really have the desire to do it now. It's so stupid. I don't feel well. If I eat better and get to walking again, I'll feel better. It's simple enough. I don't know why I'm punishing myself like this. It's almost like I'm afraid to do anything to make myself feel good. I really need to have some "want" to turn this around. I'm meeting friends in Vegas in less than 2 weeks. I can already see the disappointment in their faces when they see me. They don't get it....and I don't blame them. Even when I see super obese people, I think Geez, have some pride. How pathetic is it that I'm judgmental? What a hypocrite.
Other than a the full out assault on my body that I've been waging, some things have been alright. I read "The Hunger Games" the other day. I usually only like love stories, but that book was amaze-balls! I'd never even heard of it. Amazon just recommended it, and it was $5, so I thought, what the hell?! It's apparently part of a trilogy. I'm going to pick up the other books for the vacation. It'll be a good way to keep me distracted on the plane, b/c usually the alcohol and ipod aren't quite enough :)
Brian and I were actually able to get out the other night. We had a fantastic time. As Brian was saying, "you're in training for Vegas." And that was indeed true. I got smoked....off of Coors Light. For the first time, since I've been here, I actually had some really fun conversations w/ people. They were younger kids (probably mid 20's), and we had some awesome laughs. The next day Brian said, those girls all really liked you. I told him, they were probably just surprised that the old lady was down for partying w/ them. To which Brian replied, maybe they thought of you as a mother figure. LMAO.
Well, today is football. I'm even skipping church today. Usually I love it, but today I have zero interest in going. I'm sure I'll guilt myself all day. Guess I should've gone. Hope you guys are having a wonderful weekend! The boys have tomorrow off for Columbus Day. I don't think they've ever had that as a holiday before.
Take care. Love you guys. Thanks for always being there for me. I really do appreciate it.
I've been eating like crap lately, and drinking soda. It's pathetic. It's embarrassing. I want to get back to it, and I honestly don't know why I keep shitting the bed. I don't even really have the desire to do it now. It's so stupid. I don't feel well. If I eat better and get to walking again, I'll feel better. It's simple enough. I don't know why I'm punishing myself like this. It's almost like I'm afraid to do anything to make myself feel good. I really need to have some "want" to turn this around. I'm meeting friends in Vegas in less than 2 weeks. I can already see the disappointment in their faces when they see me. They don't get it....and I don't blame them. Even when I see super obese people, I think Geez, have some pride. How pathetic is it that I'm judgmental? What a hypocrite.
Other than a the full out assault on my body that I've been waging, some things have been alright. I read "The Hunger Games" the other day. I usually only like love stories, but that book was amaze-balls! I'd never even heard of it. Amazon just recommended it, and it was $5, so I thought, what the hell?! It's apparently part of a trilogy. I'm going to pick up the other books for the vacation. It'll be a good way to keep me distracted on the plane, b/c usually the alcohol and ipod aren't quite enough :)
Brian and I were actually able to get out the other night. We had a fantastic time. As Brian was saying, "you're in training for Vegas." And that was indeed true. I got smoked....off of Coors Light. For the first time, since I've been here, I actually had some really fun conversations w/ people. They were younger kids (probably mid 20's), and we had some awesome laughs. The next day Brian said, those girls all really liked you. I told him, they were probably just surprised that the old lady was down for partying w/ them. To which Brian replied, maybe they thought of you as a mother figure. LMAO.
Well, today is football. I'm even skipping church today. Usually I love it, but today I have zero interest in going. I'm sure I'll guilt myself all day. Guess I should've gone. Hope you guys are having a wonderful weekend! The boys have tomorrow off for Columbus Day. I don't think they've ever had that as a holiday before.
Take care. Love you guys. Thanks for always being there for me. I really do appreciate it.
RSS Feed