I plan, plan, plan (in my head) until I'm blue in the face. Day after day, I think I sneak this into this amount of time and then another thing here, etc. It almost never works out. I'm always running behind. I constantly feel like I'm disappointing everyone. Just like all of us: I try to fit too much into a day. Today is no exception. This is how my night was supposed to go...rush across town for therapy (I only have 15 mins from when I get off work until when it starts). Next, I figured I would have 45 minutes free minutes between my commute home and when I needed to pick up Cal from swim. I planned on stopping and getting in a short one mile hike on the way. However, out of nowhere it's super hot and humid today. I decided last minute not to do it, which really bummed me out. I decided to be okay with it, because I thought I would have time to eat some Papa Murphy's deLite pizza (I bought it yesterday-to make tonight-haven't had it in forever) and hoped Ryne didn't have plans and could pick Cal up for me. I have an open bottle of wine from the other night and was looking forward to a glass. Unfortunately, Ryne had band practice, so the wine had to wait and the pizza was rushed. I just got home from picking Cal up and had planned on writing on here tonight, but Caleb apparently has some race tonight and needs my laptop. So, I'm feverishly rambling here before giving up my laptop. So, the night has not gone as planned, but it's still good (aside from getting destroyed in therapy). The wine tastes amazing. Again, I'll go off plan, as I was only going to have one glass, but I think I'll have a second. I guess, flying by the seat of my pants isn't always the worst thing...
All of the above said, I spread myself too thin. It's a given for nearly every, single day. Lately I've been thinking how much I suffer for it. There isn't one thing I'm really good at. I know I should be a better wife, mother, friend, employee, dog owner, the list really goes on and on. It's been weighing heavily on me lately. I know I need to take action, because life isn't made to be lived like this. I will take the next week to make notes of the things that make me happiest and try to figure out how to make those a priority. I figure, if I'm doing the things that feed my soul, it will benefit all aspects of my life.
It has not been an easy week in a lot of ways. In fact, I would say it has been very difficult. Through it all, I'm happy to say that I lost 3 pounds 2 oz. (more than I had lost in the past 5 weeks combined) I got my mind back on track (for my food choices), and my body thanked me for it. I'm especially proud, that even through some of the toughest of times, I've at least been able to take care of my physical being.
Well, I need to hand over the keys to this laptop to a 13 year old, but first I must pass along a text I received from my therapist as I was typing this. It is in reference to the huge, mother fucking snake I saw while hiking on Sat morning (I ended our session by telling her about it). In the totem, snakes represent change and transformation. Change as in moving forward, not backwards. They also represent healing. They change and transform with each shedding. Very interesting that they are literally crossing your path! Anyway, I thought that was very cool of her to send my way. We should all be so lucky to have a therapist as caring as this one.
Hope you're enjoying a nice of peace and tranquility. Cheers from Illinois.
~Jen
All of the above said, I spread myself too thin. It's a given for nearly every, single day. Lately I've been thinking how much I suffer for it. There isn't one thing I'm really good at. I know I should be a better wife, mother, friend, employee, dog owner, the list really goes on and on. It's been weighing heavily on me lately. I know I need to take action, because life isn't made to be lived like this. I will take the next week to make notes of the things that make me happiest and try to figure out how to make those a priority. I figure, if I'm doing the things that feed my soul, it will benefit all aspects of my life.
It has not been an easy week in a lot of ways. In fact, I would say it has been very difficult. Through it all, I'm happy to say that I lost 3 pounds 2 oz. (more than I had lost in the past 5 weeks combined) I got my mind back on track (for my food choices), and my body thanked me for it. I'm especially proud, that even through some of the toughest of times, I've at least been able to take care of my physical being.
Well, I need to hand over the keys to this laptop to a 13 year old, but first I must pass along a text I received from my therapist as I was typing this. It is in reference to the huge, mother fucking snake I saw while hiking on Sat morning (I ended our session by telling her about it). In the totem, snakes represent change and transformation. Change as in moving forward, not backwards. They also represent healing. They change and transform with each shedding. Very interesting that they are literally crossing your path! Anyway, I thought that was very cool of her to send my way. We should all be so lucky to have a therapist as caring as this one.
Hope you're enjoying a nice of peace and tranquility. Cheers from Illinois.
~Jen
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