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Diariesofafatass.com

"So tired that I couldn't even sleep"

9/27/2012

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Today is one of those days where there just literally isn't enough time in the day to get it all done.  I worked my ass off at work (literally, doing inventory), but didn't get everything done that I needed.  I'll be even further behind tomorrow.  I hate that feeling.  I've wanted to work late the past two nights, but Brian has had to, so I've had to get home to the boys.  Today was a real rush, as Cal's swim practice got moved up to 4:30, instead of 7, so I was driving like a crazy lady (as usual) to get home and get him to practice.  Man alive, he sure loves it.  I'm so excited.  Oh, and speaking of Caleb, a little girl whispered to him that she has a crush on him last week.  Apparently yesterday she told him he loved her.  Caleb says he still has to make up his mind, though.  He doesn't know if he wants to be her boyfriend.  This is the same kid that last year told me had 5 girlfriends at one time.  But this is a real "first."  Too cute.  I love it!

Ryno has been sick this week.  He even missed a couple of school days and football practice all week.  Thankfully they don't have a game this weekend.  Next weekend they play for 3rd place, though.  The boys are all pretty excited.  So cool to see.  They worked really hard and earned it.

My eating has still been really good.  It's only been 4 days, and I already feel a difference (also 2 weeks off of pop).  I know how good it makes me feel.  I need to keep it up.  When I eat like shit, I feel like shit.  It's that simple.  It sucks that I find comfort in food, and it makes me fat, unhealthy, and makes me literally feel sick.  Why would I find/seek comfort in something like that.  Stupid.

No time to get a walk in tonight, but I'm okay with that.  I worked really hard climbing ladders, moving stuff, etc. at work today.  I know I was able to burn some calories.  I feel good, guys.  I really do.  I can't wait for this all to continue.  I want that feeling of being healthy every day.  I want to feel proud of the way I treat my body.  I don't want to beat myself up over the fact that poor Brian married someone that turned into a fat slob, anymore.  I do know that he's proud of me, and I love him for it.  But I want to believe all of the awesome things he says to me about being pretty, etc.  Lots of work to get there, and that's probably too tall of order for me, but I'm working on it.

Oh, and my wish for tonight is that I'll actually be able to turn my mind off and get some desp

Have a great night.

Jen

6:30  Smoothie (water, flax seed, spinach, banana, frozen blueberries)
8:00  Hot green tea
9:30  Large bowl of grapes, strawberries and raspberries
1:00  Huge bowl of kale w/ half a yellow pepper and lite honey mustard dressing (the kale was awfully tough, but I made myself eat it), and a steamed bag of veggies w/ potatoes
4:15  Pear
6:30  "Accidental goulash" see recipe and steamed broccoli


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    Jen

    Age 47
    Married 24 years
    2 boys, 18 & 15
    email: [email protected]


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