First thing Monday morning, I got the corporate email that there was an “all-employee meeting.” Immediately my stomach was in knots, before really trying to look at things matter of factly. We have picked up some decent orders the past couple of weeks. I really was hoping it was going to be a Raw-Raw meeting, as the spirits around here have been so down. Quickly I knew that wasn’t going to be the case. For an hour, my stomach was flipping all over the place. It was funny, not for a moment was I worried about my own job, but I thought of my coworkers. We have such a great relationship, and I feel so maternal toward some of them. This is third round of layoffs I’ve been through in the last year and a half I’ve worked here. After the last one, one thing was clear: it’s hard to put your finger on who will be the ones to go. The morning brought forth news that I never saw coming in a million years… The friend I go to all of the concerts with (including my beloved Air Supply) was on this cut list. I’d always told her that she’d be the last to go. I mean, she is the H.R. manager. Somebody has to help all of the people who have lost their jobs, with all of the paperwork, etc. But no….apparently our company is going to go without an H.R. department. Honestly, that’s something I’ve never heard of (especially with a co of this size). The H.R. responsibilities will be dispersed amongst the accounting department. You know how incredibly fat I am, but you could’ve blown me over with a feather. The feedback, or I should I say, anger, I’ve heard about this from coworkers has been crazy. Everyone is in shock. I’m still in shock, but mostly sad. I’m of course very sad on a personal level. She’s the one I spend more time with than anyone. But I’m also very sad that I work somewhere that I can’t rely on. Everyone is looking over their shoulder, all of the time. I have one friend here, who is the most positive person you’d ever know. She cried on her way into work yesterday, as she didn’t want to come in. This is someone who has looked forward to being here. I’m sad that the dynamics we have, which have already been greatly affected by previous layoffs will likely no longer be recognizable. For now, I have a paycheck. I’ll think of that every day. Just like with most of you: it’s why I work. This is far from my dream job, but I couldn’t ask to work with a better group of people… I just couldn’t.
Monday also brought news about my close friend/coworker and his surgery. He only had a days notice that his surgery would be the following day. He was pretty rattled, as the surgery was going to entail a lot more than they’d ever described to him. His surgery was last night. It sounds like he came through it good, but he was in a tremendous amount of pain last night. We are waiting for more updates today. So, if you have a moment, please ask God to continue to watch over “White 5.” God will see the humor in it, too ;) When we get the word that he is doing good, we will send “Congratulations it’s a girl!” balloons and flowers. After all, we have to keep in tradition of the birthday card to the friend in mourning spirit. Like I said, my coworkers are the best and simply have a fantastic sense of humor.
So, the past couple of days have been overwhelming, so I like to think back to my weekend. It really was a perfect weekend. It’s my place right now, as I sit here nervously worrying about my friend after his surgery and have concern to my good friend and the fact that she’ll be leaving us.
I’ll leave you with a song by one of my new favorites. I’m way late to the game I know, but a couple of my coworkers got me into her (including the one who just had surgery). I love this song.
-And all of my friends who think I’m blessed. They don’t know my head is a mess.