Happy Saturday! Hopefully you're somewhere that isn't storming like it is here. It's purely miserable out there. I wanted to make myself get out there today with Jesse, but you know...the weather....but I do have a gym membership. I could've done more today, but I am exhausted....I've been drained for the past 10 days or so. I feel better than I have today, and I kept telling myself to do more-but I have nothing in me. I mentioned a couple of months ago how my stomach was hurting. Long story short-turns out I have gallstones. This time around has been more intense than the first and has been much slower to respond to the meds. I'd resigned myself to the fact that I would need to get my gallbladder removed, but I had a scan done and my gallbladder is okay. I meet with the Dr. on Monday to see where to go from here. I only know, that I need something done. More than anything, the fatigue has gotten to me. The very best part of my weight loss has been my increased energy level. This has taken it away, though. It has taken everything I have to get through the day, this past week and a half. Even today, with my stomach just nagging instead of screaming, I feel my bags under my eyes drooping down my face.
In spite of my lower activity levels, I was happy to lose 2 pounds last week. This past couple of weeks, has been a total head fuck in that I ended up with gallstones-something usually attributed to fatty foods, but those foods are no longer a part of my life. It turns out you can also get them from rapid weight loss, which I really have not had "rapid" loss, but they did show up when I was having a breakdown and lost 9 pounds in two weeks. Who knows...maybe I had them before and then they just awakened. Anyway, with the possibility that losing weight actually caused this, I'll admit my immediate thought was-add more fat to your diet. That's stupid, but I'm a food addict, and I'll look for any excuse to eat more. On the nights where I've been out late for the kids sports, I have allowed myself to eat a little something when I get home, if I'm really hungry. I did not do that before. So, I guess these stones have changed my approach just a tiny bit. My eyes are still on the prize, and I have not gone off the rails.
I bought my ticket home today, which is also a nice motivation to keep trucking. I certainly would like to weigh less when I go home, than I do now. I made the brutal mistake of looking up my BMI today, and has that ever fucked with my head. I shouldn't have done that. I have so far to go, and all day, that's all I've been able to think about. Dare I say, it hit me harder than the number on the scale does.
I didn't mean for this entry to turn out as much of a bummer as it has. Really, I am thrilled with losing 5 pounds in two weeks. I would love to keep that going. I'm hoping to get my energy back soon, so I feel like I have more of a fighting chance. Diet is 80% of weight loss, but I'm already extremely concerned about loose skin, so it's imperative that I get my body going. Oh on that note, I had my 2 month physical therapy eval yesterday. I was given the option of continuing or getting rechecked in two weeks, which is of course what I chose. She feels I should continue but also knows insurance is always a battle. I'll keep plugging away on the exercises at home and hopefully I'll get the green light out of there, in a couple of weeks. My back is improving, just not at lightning speed. It is way better, though.
I hope you have a wonderful rest of your weekend. Keep your eye on the prize, despite any obstacles that get thrown your way. There will always be obstacles. There will always be reasons to quit. Be bigger than those reasons. You're worth it. We all just have the one body-let's take care of it.
~Jen
In spite of my lower activity levels, I was happy to lose 2 pounds last week. This past couple of weeks, has been a total head fuck in that I ended up with gallstones-something usually attributed to fatty foods, but those foods are no longer a part of my life. It turns out you can also get them from rapid weight loss, which I really have not had "rapid" loss, but they did show up when I was having a breakdown and lost 9 pounds in two weeks. Who knows...maybe I had them before and then they just awakened. Anyway, with the possibility that losing weight actually caused this, I'll admit my immediate thought was-add more fat to your diet. That's stupid, but I'm a food addict, and I'll look for any excuse to eat more. On the nights where I've been out late for the kids sports, I have allowed myself to eat a little something when I get home, if I'm really hungry. I did not do that before. So, I guess these stones have changed my approach just a tiny bit. My eyes are still on the prize, and I have not gone off the rails.
I bought my ticket home today, which is also a nice motivation to keep trucking. I certainly would like to weigh less when I go home, than I do now. I made the brutal mistake of looking up my BMI today, and has that ever fucked with my head. I shouldn't have done that. I have so far to go, and all day, that's all I've been able to think about. Dare I say, it hit me harder than the number on the scale does.
I didn't mean for this entry to turn out as much of a bummer as it has. Really, I am thrilled with losing 5 pounds in two weeks. I would love to keep that going. I'm hoping to get my energy back soon, so I feel like I have more of a fighting chance. Diet is 80% of weight loss, but I'm already extremely concerned about loose skin, so it's imperative that I get my body going. Oh on that note, I had my 2 month physical therapy eval yesterday. I was given the option of continuing or getting rechecked in two weeks, which is of course what I chose. She feels I should continue but also knows insurance is always a battle. I'll keep plugging away on the exercises at home and hopefully I'll get the green light out of there, in a couple of weeks. My back is improving, just not at lightning speed. It is way better, though.
I hope you have a wonderful rest of your weekend. Keep your eye on the prize, despite any obstacles that get thrown your way. There will always be obstacles. There will always be reasons to quit. Be bigger than those reasons. You're worth it. We all just have the one body-let's take care of it.
~Jen
RSS Feed