Well, two days ago the monthly finally came around. Let me tell you something, I'm in the heart of it right now. I swear, I don't know how I have any blood left to flow through my veins once my time of month comes around. It's truly gruesome. Yes, I know you were dying to hear all about it, weren't you? I mention it, because as always the hormones are totally f'ing with me. I could feel it coming on yesterday, and then they grabbed hold of me this afternoon. Really, it was right out of nowhere. The tears just started flowing. MOFO.... I was so pissed. I know it's the sleep deprivation, too. My sleep has been so jacked up for a while now. Last night I woke up at 2, and I couldn't get back to sleep. It's positively brutal. I'm praying tonight is the night that my body/mind let me surrender to slumber. Anyway, I was so mad at myself for getting the tears again. I hadn't had them in a while. It lasted a good couple of hours, when I let it. If I allowed myself to work at my desk, I was screwed. Too much time to think. So, I kept getting up and doing work in the warehouse, shipping, etc. to keep my mind tied up. And then, just as quickly as they came on, they left. I've been fine, since. It's really crazy.
My diet hasn't been very good the past two days. Maybe that's a contributor to the hormonal swings, too. I've made sure to take semi-care of myself, though. I've made sure to get fruits and veggies in there, too. I'm hoping I'm back on track tomorrow. I don't feel good, when I don't eat well. I suppose that's true for most of us, yet we still find ourselves eating processed shit. Ugh. But I'm not going to let this slip take me out. Overall, I have been much healthier all the way around and I plan to continue. I'm desperate to get my body/mind healthy. And I really do mean desperate....
I mentioned that swimming started back up for Cal. He's having a great time. It keeps me pretty busy, though. I've taken him the past two nights and it really does take over all of my free time. Yesterday I came home to a messy house and just couldn't take it. I had about 25 mins. before we had to leave for practice. I just dove in with the cleaning. As soon as we got home, I dove in again. I got a ton done, and it's even starting to look like Christmas threw up in here, just as I like. I didn't stop until after 9. I figured I was bound to sleep, since I'd been running for so long...but as mentioned earlier, it didn't turn out that way. At least the house looks better tonight. Oh, Brian left the house at 5:30 yesterday morning and didn't get home from work until after 9. Today's more of the same. Poor guy. So, I was going to take Cal to swim tonight when I got home, but he has the sniffles. Thankfully, he actually agreed to stay home. When he's been sick before he would insist on going. He knows we have a busy Christmasy weekend planned, so he's hoping to get himself healthy. It was good news for me that he wanted to stay home, too. I'm getting some much needed rest and relaxation. It feels so nice...
Sorry, I didn't have anything too exciting to report today. Still feeling kind of the same....homesick....missing friends and family....wishing we were closer to those we love and who love us.....
Hope you're having a good night,
Jen
"Home" by Michael Buble
Another
summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go
home
Mmmmmmmm
May be surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel
all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss you, you know
And I’ve
been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or
two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that
it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than
that
Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky, I know
But
I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home
Let me go home
I’m just
too far from where you are
I wanna come home
And I feel just like I’m
living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When
everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along
with me
'Cause this was not your dream
But you always believed in
me
Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and
Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home
And I’m surrounded by
A
million people I
Still feel all alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss
you, you know
Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I
gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home
tonight
I’m coming back home
My diet hasn't been very good the past two days. Maybe that's a contributor to the hormonal swings, too. I've made sure to take semi-care of myself, though. I've made sure to get fruits and veggies in there, too. I'm hoping I'm back on track tomorrow. I don't feel good, when I don't eat well. I suppose that's true for most of us, yet we still find ourselves eating processed shit. Ugh. But I'm not going to let this slip take me out. Overall, I have been much healthier all the way around and I plan to continue. I'm desperate to get my body/mind healthy. And I really do mean desperate....
I mentioned that swimming started back up for Cal. He's having a great time. It keeps me pretty busy, though. I've taken him the past two nights and it really does take over all of my free time. Yesterday I came home to a messy house and just couldn't take it. I had about 25 mins. before we had to leave for practice. I just dove in with the cleaning. As soon as we got home, I dove in again. I got a ton done, and it's even starting to look like Christmas threw up in here, just as I like. I didn't stop until after 9. I figured I was bound to sleep, since I'd been running for so long...but as mentioned earlier, it didn't turn out that way. At least the house looks better tonight. Oh, Brian left the house at 5:30 yesterday morning and didn't get home from work until after 9. Today's more of the same. Poor guy. So, I was going to take Cal to swim tonight when I got home, but he has the sniffles. Thankfully, he actually agreed to stay home. When he's been sick before he would insist on going. He knows we have a busy Christmasy weekend planned, so he's hoping to get himself healthy. It was good news for me that he wanted to stay home, too. I'm getting some much needed rest and relaxation. It feels so nice...
Sorry, I didn't have anything too exciting to report today. Still feeling kind of the same....homesick....missing friends and family....wishing we were closer to those we love and who love us.....
Hope you're having a good night,
Jen
"Home" by Michael Buble
Another
summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go
home
Mmmmmmmm
May be surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel
all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss you, you know
And I’ve
been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or
two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that
it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than
that
Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky, I know
But
I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home
Let me go home
I’m just
too far from where you are
I wanna come home
And I feel just like I’m
living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When
everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along
with me
'Cause this was not your dream
But you always believed in
me
Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and
Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home
And I’m surrounded by
A
million people I
Still feel all alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss
you, you know
Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I
gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home
tonight
I’m coming back home
RSS Feed