My body has really been messing with me lately. I had some pretty good cramps on most of Wed. That night at the store, I broke out into a sweat and had to rush home to puke. The pain was crazy.... I was asleep by 8 that night: knocked on my ass fo sho. The cramps were still there on Thursday, but not as bad. I'd had to take the day off, for appts. for the kids. It was a good thing. It gave my body a little breather. I even went off of pop on Thurs. I knew that the caffeine and poison mixture probably was doing a disservice to my body and everything it was going through. The headaches were severe for two days, but along w/ everything else it was just parr for course. I'm so glad to be free of it. It's still a habit I have to fight off. I want it almost all the time...it was my stress reliever, it gave me an excuse to go to another building at work, and get out of my office, it helped the boredom, and most importantly shut up the voice inside my head that said: go get a pop, go get a pop..... All of that stuff is still there, but at least the withdrawls are pretty much gone.
So, you'd think by now Aunt Flow would've come to visit, but she hasn't. Now my body is feeling "normal" with the exeption of a cramp here and there. I can't tell you how many times I've run to the bathroom thinking it finally arrived. Nope. This must be one of the crappy things that goes along with premenopause. And they say this shit can last for years and years. It's horrible. Wouldn't wish it on anyone...
I guess the way my body has been feeling is in direct relationship with my terrible, terrible self esteem lately. It's been worse than usual (and you know how bad that is...) I'm working on it, though. It's always a process.
Yesterday Ryne actually got to play a lot in the football game. We were so excited for him. I'm glad the coaching staff made right with all the kids they'd sat the week before. Byron rolled the team we were playing, so lots of opportunity for kids to play. Ryne never plays RB, but they had him there at the end of the game. He fumbled twice in a row. Ouch. Then they got another chance and gave it to Ryne again. He picked up a few yards. It was huge for his confidence. He was so stoked after the game! Last week he spent the night w/ a buddy, so this week he had the boy spend the night w/ him. He also has a bday party to go to today. I'm so very happy to see him making friends like he has. The boys all really seems to like him.
Cal is still enjoying the school. He likes it so much more than his previous one. It is funny, though.. I had a long meeting with the school social worker and the nurse the other day. The social worker checks in to make sure all is going well with Cal and school and that he's not feeling bullied, etc. Anyway, the social worker commented on how little Cal has been stimming (flapping hands, etc), and how she even observed him starting to do it, and then he sat on his hands and rocked back and forth trying to stop himslef. Cal and I have talked a lot about different wasy to "get out the wiggles" so he isn't judged by his classmates. Just two days after the social worker told me she didn't think any of the kids even notice, Cal told me how he didn't want to tell this boy he had Autism. I said, why would you need to tell him? You don't need to tell anyone if you don't want. He said, well (insert boy name here-don't remember) said that he thinks me and Austin (another child on the spectrum) have brain damage. I said why would he say that. Cal said, because we get the wiggles. Kids are much more perceptvie than we (even ppl trained in that area) give them credit for.... The thing that bothered me, was that Cal seemed to be happy with the boy thinking he had brain damage, rather than Autism. So, I had to explain to him again that Autism is not a bad thing. And that Caleb is really lucky in that he hardly has it, I tried explaining. Cal said really? I hardly have it? I said, well you're considered very high functioning. Autism isn't who you are. It's just a small part of you. So, hopefully the talked worked.
On a really great note for Cal, though. We signed him up for swim team. He's in a beginners group (kind of an orientation for a few months) where they work on all 4 strokes. He absolutely loves swimming, although he always talks about being last. We explain to him that these kids have been doing it longer. But what's great, is they are going to have a "most improved" on the free style today. Cal thinks he can get it :) How awesome. Swimming is a perfect sport for him. We are so excited for him. Hopefully it'll bring him close to his teammates, too. They are mostly girls, though. However, Cal does much prefer the ladies to boys. hahaha.
Happy Sunday everyone. Hope your day finds you self content and comfortable in your own skin.