I tried really hard to stick to my 10:00 bedtime last night. Of course I pushed myself, thinking I could get a couple of things done before going to bed, and made myself late. But, as you know, I’m rarely on time to anything. I started
brushing my teeth at 9:58, so now I know I need to start doing the bedtime
ritual 15 mins earlier, as I didn’t get to bed until 10:15. In the grand scheme of things, it really didn’t matter. My mind still wanted to do other things. I think I got to sleep sometime after 11. So, it makes perfect sense that I would wake up at 3:15, right? Ugh. For the life of me, I could not get back to sleep. So, I
got up at 4:30 and went on a brisk 45 min. walk. It felt really good. It was one of those mornings that I actually enjoyed listening to the birds’ sing, instead of cussing the “stupid birds” in my head. It was actually cool outside. It’s been super-hot and humid, so it was great to get an early morning reprieve. My iPod started with “Nookie” by Limp Bizkit and then went into Afternoon Delight (the ringtone for my hubby), and then right into songs about drinking. If only “Eat It” by Weird Al would’ve come on all of my borderline obsessions could’ve been addressed. I can’t get to the gym tonight, so I’m hoping to sneak another walk in at some point later on. The goal is to keep myself so busy, that I actually sleep.
I’ve done fairly well on my eating so far today. I did bring bean soup, but of course fell for the temptation of a coworkers offer to buy Subway. I did stick to the veggie sandwich, at least, but that’s way more bread than I needed today.
I thought in light of yesterday’s heavy blog entry I’d use “I’m Not Dead, Yet” by Pink as the song of the day. I simply adore her. I don’t know that she’s ever had a song I didn’t love. She’s on a very short list of concerts that I really want to see one day.
Food:
6:30
Green juice (I used the vita mix for most of it, so I wouldn’t have all the waste that the juicer gives. It’s a bit thicker but still good.
8:00
Plain packet of oatmeal w/ water, 20 oz of Diet Dr. Pepper….I’m an idiot.
10:00
Bowl of watermelon
12:15
Foot long Veggie Delight (wheat bread, honey mustard, spinach, lettuce
olives, tomatoes, banana peppers, pickles)
1:15
A stupid 20 oz of Diet Coke.
MOFO!
3:45 Green juice
5:15 Oatmeal cookie
6:00 Watermellon
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
There's always cracks
Crack of
sunlight
Crack in the mirror on your lips
It's the moment of a sunset
Friday
When our conversations twist
It's the fifth day of ice on a new
tattoo
But the ice should be on our heads
We only spun the web to catch
ourselves
So we weren't left for dead
And I was never looking for
approval from anyone but you
And though this journey is over I'll go back if
you ask me to
I'm not dead just floating
Right between the ink of your
tattoo
In the belly of the beast we turned into
I'm not scared just
changing
Right beyond the cigarette and the devilish smile
You're my crack
of sunlight
You can do the math a thousand ways but you can't erase the
facts
That others come and others go but you always come back
I'm a winter
flower underground always thirsty for summer rain
And just like the change of
seasons
I know you'll be back again
I'm not dead just floating
Underneath the ink of my tattoo
I've tried to hide my scars from you
I'm
not scared just changing
Right beyond the cigarette and the devilish
smile
You're my crack of sunlight oh
I'm not dead just yet
I'm not
dead I'm just floating
Doesn't matter where I'm going
I'll find you
I'm
not scared at all
Underneath the cuts and bruises
Finally gained what no
one loses
I'll find you
I will find you
I'm not dead just
floating
I'm not scared just changing
You're my crack of sunlight
yeah