Well, fuck! does say it all. I just spent 1/2 hour or more typing out today's entry and I lost it. I was careful to save it to draft a few times a long the way, but I got up to get the cord for the laptop, plugged it in, and the fucking thing disappeared. If I'm going to keep the site up, I really need to find another vehicle to run it on.
I guess you didn't miss much. Essentially I talked about how awesome parts of Friday night were (beers w/ lots of co-workers) then I went out to my friend's sisters house for a bbq. There, I switched to red wine, which can knock me on my ass. We had a great time, but the night ended w/ me getting super fucking drunk, out of nowhere it would seem. I even puked. I think it's been at least 6 years, since I've done that from drinking (although I do have a terrible memory, so maybe I'm wrong). I went my 40th birthday (drinking tons of shots), several Vegas trips of drinking all day w/ no vomit. To utterly and completely humiliating myself at "K's" house. I did the true walk of shame the next day. I'm afraid I may have ruined 2 of her pillow cases and I know the bed skirt needed to be cleaned. I soaked them in spray and put them in the wash. I hope for the best. K seemed none to pleased with me, but I can't blame her. What a fucking lush. I left there wishing to God I'd never come in the first place. I had a 2 hour drive ahead of me and I was just trying to keep from throwing up again. I noticed I had a couple of texts, which were apparent replies from texts I'd sent the night before. Of which, I truly only had a vague recollection of sending at all. I most certainly didn't remember what I'd said in them. One required a response from me, but I was driving, so I called my good friend. She talked me off the ledge. I called her in shear terror of what had transpired and she laughed and said, sounds like you had fun. No matter what I threw at her about the night, she laughed which had me laughing and saved me from feeling like the worst person of all time. Friends like that are hard to come by. I don't know that I've ever had somebody turn around a situation for me like that before, esp. given my latest bouts of self hatred. I have no doubt I'll never be invited back again (to K's house), which it too bad, but I'll also have a new sheet set sent to her in order to offer up my apology.
When I finally arrived home that next day, Brian was just going out to take the boys to lunch. I was so happy. I wasn't ready to eat, but I was ready for alone time in the bedroom. Get your mind out of the gutter....for sleep. I spent most of the day in bed. I was so damn sick. Brian ended up getting called into work for a while, so it was just me and the boys. Thankfully they were on super good behavior. They were all too thrilled when the late afternoon came around and I was ready to eat. I called in dinner at the cafe (their favorite of the 2 places to eat in town). Food helped my tummy for a while, but the wicked headache never did subside. Before I choose to mix wine and beer again, I'll just save myself some trouble and bash myself upside the head with the wine bottle. And thank God I have such an understanding husband. He was shocked that I'd gotten sick, but we both know I'm an idiot for drinking too much on all of these damn pills I have to take.
Anyway, thankfully today is a new day. I woke up early, since I slept so much yesterday. Caleb slept with me, which is getting to be a habit that really needs to be broken. Poor Brian ends up sleeping on Cal's bed. Which I don't know that he hates, since the boys now both have better mattresses than ours. Later in the morning, the boys brought in some flowers and a card from each of them. Very sweet. I really wasn't expecting anything. It's been a long, long time since I've received flowers so I was very appreciative. We tried to get out and do something as a family, but just after we left, Brian was called into work again. Ugh. So, the boys and I came back and we took Junior for a walk (the boys both rode their bikes-Cal's is a big 3 wheeler). It felt so nice to be out in the sun, but it was pretty windy. The walk proved to be a bit too much for Junior today. He's been pretty tired and stiff ever since. The boys started to play together, so I went to relax in my room and read more of the 2nd Fifty Shades of Grey book. I'd gotten quite a ways into yesterday while I was bed bound. I read quite a bit of it, and then the events of Friday night and yesterday must've still been with me a bit. I fell asleep for a couple of hours or so. It was so nice. I woke up when Brian got back from work. He then took the boys out to play baseball, so I was able to get lost in my book once again. Oh, there's a hillarious SNL skit about Fifty Shades of Grey being the perfect Mother's Day gift. You can find it on YouTube. Maybe the funniest thing I've ever seen. Hits awfully close to home :) Anyway, I ended up finishing the book today. I didn't love it as much as the first, but I'll still read the third. Maybe I'll start it next weekend.
Tonight has continued to be great. Brian "made" dinner. He made a frozen Stouffers Cheese lasanga, bought some sliced french bread, and bagged salad. It really was a good meal. I'm telling you, Stouffers does those things better than I can! I also got some cleaning and laundry done tonight. Thank goodness I wasn' in total neglect this weekend :) Plus, Brian did a good job of cleaning up this weekend. I think he knows I've been pushed on those limits a little too much lately.
Tomorrow will be really busy. Caleb has an appt w/ his eye surgeon. Those appt.'s always suck. Plus, Cal hates being in the car, and the appt. is in Chicago. Will be a long day. Ryne has his first day of baseball tomorrow, which we're all super stoked for. I hope we can get back, before it all starts. But most importantly my oldest boy, Ryne turns 11. It makes me so happy and sad at the same time. My baby is growing up there's no doubt..... He's requested the same dinner Brian requested for his birthday a couple of weeks ago. I'll be elbow deep in hamburger, making meatloaf tomorrow night. Ugh. Oh well, I love that they will love the meal. Plus, I can eat the heck out of those mashed potatoes.
Happy Mother's Day and love to all,
Jen
I guess you didn't miss much. Essentially I talked about how awesome parts of Friday night were (beers w/ lots of co-workers) then I went out to my friend's sisters house for a bbq. There, I switched to red wine, which can knock me on my ass. We had a great time, but the night ended w/ me getting super fucking drunk, out of nowhere it would seem. I even puked. I think it's been at least 6 years, since I've done that from drinking (although I do have a terrible memory, so maybe I'm wrong). I went my 40th birthday (drinking tons of shots), several Vegas trips of drinking all day w/ no vomit. To utterly and completely humiliating myself at "K's" house. I did the true walk of shame the next day. I'm afraid I may have ruined 2 of her pillow cases and I know the bed skirt needed to be cleaned. I soaked them in spray and put them in the wash. I hope for the best. K seemed none to pleased with me, but I can't blame her. What a fucking lush. I left there wishing to God I'd never come in the first place. I had a 2 hour drive ahead of me and I was just trying to keep from throwing up again. I noticed I had a couple of texts, which were apparent replies from texts I'd sent the night before. Of which, I truly only had a vague recollection of sending at all. I most certainly didn't remember what I'd said in them. One required a response from me, but I was driving, so I called my good friend. She talked me off the ledge. I called her in shear terror of what had transpired and she laughed and said, sounds like you had fun. No matter what I threw at her about the night, she laughed which had me laughing and saved me from feeling like the worst person of all time. Friends like that are hard to come by. I don't know that I've ever had somebody turn around a situation for me like that before, esp. given my latest bouts of self hatred. I have no doubt I'll never be invited back again (to K's house), which it too bad, but I'll also have a new sheet set sent to her in order to offer up my apology.
When I finally arrived home that next day, Brian was just going out to take the boys to lunch. I was so happy. I wasn't ready to eat, but I was ready for alone time in the bedroom. Get your mind out of the gutter....for sleep. I spent most of the day in bed. I was so damn sick. Brian ended up getting called into work for a while, so it was just me and the boys. Thankfully they were on super good behavior. They were all too thrilled when the late afternoon came around and I was ready to eat. I called in dinner at the cafe (their favorite of the 2 places to eat in town). Food helped my tummy for a while, but the wicked headache never did subside. Before I choose to mix wine and beer again, I'll just save myself some trouble and bash myself upside the head with the wine bottle. And thank God I have such an understanding husband. He was shocked that I'd gotten sick, but we both know I'm an idiot for drinking too much on all of these damn pills I have to take.
Anyway, thankfully today is a new day. I woke up early, since I slept so much yesterday. Caleb slept with me, which is getting to be a habit that really needs to be broken. Poor Brian ends up sleeping on Cal's bed. Which I don't know that he hates, since the boys now both have better mattresses than ours. Later in the morning, the boys brought in some flowers and a card from each of them. Very sweet. I really wasn't expecting anything. It's been a long, long time since I've received flowers so I was very appreciative. We tried to get out and do something as a family, but just after we left, Brian was called into work again. Ugh. So, the boys and I came back and we took Junior for a walk (the boys both rode their bikes-Cal's is a big 3 wheeler). It felt so nice to be out in the sun, but it was pretty windy. The walk proved to be a bit too much for Junior today. He's been pretty tired and stiff ever since. The boys started to play together, so I went to relax in my room and read more of the 2nd Fifty Shades of Grey book. I'd gotten quite a ways into yesterday while I was bed bound. I read quite a bit of it, and then the events of Friday night and yesterday must've still been with me a bit. I fell asleep for a couple of hours or so. It was so nice. I woke up when Brian got back from work. He then took the boys out to play baseball, so I was able to get lost in my book once again. Oh, there's a hillarious SNL skit about Fifty Shades of Grey being the perfect Mother's Day gift. You can find it on YouTube. Maybe the funniest thing I've ever seen. Hits awfully close to home :) Anyway, I ended up finishing the book today. I didn't love it as much as the first, but I'll still read the third. Maybe I'll start it next weekend.
Tonight has continued to be great. Brian "made" dinner. He made a frozen Stouffers Cheese lasanga, bought some sliced french bread, and bagged salad. It really was a good meal. I'm telling you, Stouffers does those things better than I can! I also got some cleaning and laundry done tonight. Thank goodness I wasn' in total neglect this weekend :) Plus, Brian did a good job of cleaning up this weekend. I think he knows I've been pushed on those limits a little too much lately.
Tomorrow will be really busy. Caleb has an appt w/ his eye surgeon. Those appt.'s always suck. Plus, Cal hates being in the car, and the appt. is in Chicago. Will be a long day. Ryne has his first day of baseball tomorrow, which we're all super stoked for. I hope we can get back, before it all starts. But most importantly my oldest boy, Ryne turns 11. It makes me so happy and sad at the same time. My baby is growing up there's no doubt..... He's requested the same dinner Brian requested for his birthday a couple of weeks ago. I'll be elbow deep in hamburger, making meatloaf tomorrow night. Ugh. Oh well, I love that they will love the meal. Plus, I can eat the heck out of those mashed potatoes.
Happy Mother's Day and love to all,
Jen
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