The job is really great. I think it's a good fit for both my boss and me. I was able to contribute today, and she told me that she feels she can show me something once and have it get done. I like that. We work in the Maintenance building, so we are with a bunch of men. They share our bathroom. We share the breakroom, which has the fridge and microwave. The bathroom was so filthy I scrubbed it down (which is apparently our responsibility) today. I couldn't stand it like it was. It was so bad. I thought I was going to vomit. I was leaning over the sink heaving. That's when I figured I'd done enough in there. So gross. Also, I used the microwave at lunch time, and it was truly the worst thing I'd ever seen (apparently it's the guys that are supposed to keep that room clean). I've already resigned myself to putting a little fridge in my office, but I may have to be a totally crazy chick, and put a microwave in there, too. I'd hate for my hangups to distract from a good job.
When I got home today, I was again beat ass tired. I haven't been sleeping well at all. Today, I actually totally fell asleep for a couple of hours, clothes on and all. I thought about just trying to go back to sleep for the night, but I needed to get a couple of things done, and most importantly make myself eat. I wasn't hungry, but I need to do this right. I've also got to figure a good snack (like an apple or something) for the drive home. Both days when I've gotten home, I've been really hungry and made bad choices.
Going into this week, I knew I wouldn't be able to get my workouts in. I've got to figure out how/when to do them. I've grown to crave working out. However, there's a difference between working out when I want, and trying to squeeze it in, while feeling exhausted, etc. I'll have some sort of balance down, next week.
Today is the best day, food wise that I've had in a week. This past week really has been the worst week in a while. And by worst, I mean far and away the worst. I am not looking forward to the weigh in tomorrow. I know whatever the scale shows, that it's totally on me. I also know I'll probably go back above that fucking 200 mark. Once one gets below that, they should never, ever go back. Yet, this will be my second time around (in the past 56 days). Plus, I'm sure there will be much more above that. My pants were fitting pretty snug in the stomach today. Crap. I've got to reverse this.
Hope you all had a great day,
6:40 Smoothie (water, spinach, flax seed, banana, blueberries, strawberries)
7:00 Soda Water
12:00 Cauliflower soup (see recipe), Spring Mix salad w/ lite honey mustard dressing, soda water
4:45 1/2 pb sandwich on wheat
7:50 Black bean patty w/ 1/2 avocado, plus salsa. Steamed veggies: carrots, cauliflower, broccoli