Another early morning. It's so weird...both mornings this weekend I woke up before anyone else. Ugh. I hate that. Oh well, this morning it gave me an opportunity to make a Vegan chowder before church. I'll try to add the recipe tomorrow. It's really quite good, and much easier than most of the other soups I do. I had a good time jamming to some Christmas music while I was making it and felt great going into church. Church started good, but when we started bringing up people for the prayer list, I added Gail Blatchley. She's been on my mind so much lately. I can't believe it's been a year. Anyway, after I added her, I couldn't get the image of seeing her 12 hours before she passed. Nobody should have to suffer like that. She was such a wonderful person, I'll never get it...never. Well, for some reason it hit me like a ton of bricks. I just started weeping. I probably wept for 30 mins. straight. I cried harder than when it actually happend. It was so weird. Before this past year, or less, I was never much of a crier. Now, I guess I'm unable to contain my emotions, anymore. Maybe this is a good thing... I don't know. It's so...new...and strange to me. I'd always been, what I thought was, "strong."
I spent the rest of the day, either being lazy and watching football, or cleaning and doing laundry. It was fairly relaxing. I really wanted to take it easy, as my mouth has been killing me. I have a dentist appt. in the morning. I wanted to wait until Jan., so I would have full benefits, but there's no way I can take it anymore. My jaw is throbbing, and I can't eat on that side. It's been bugging me for a few months, but I knew how expensive it was going to be, so I tried to put it off. Turns out that was a dumb ass move.
Tonight I'm missing my friends in a big way. Again, it's just come out of nowhere. Life has/is been so good. I don't know. I just wish I could hang out with some of them, and b.s. about nothing of any importance. I also wish that I had more confidence in some friendships. As try as I might, I'm afraid that some will never be the same. I know it happens in every relationship, but it really saddens me. All relationships have ups and downs....I just wish I could ride out the waves more easily. Anyway, it's not something I'd been really thinking about lately, but tonight it's kind of hit me. Maybe it's all of the pain my mouth is in. Hard to think about good things, when it hurts to even smile. Or, God forbid, when Brian thought he was being cute and went in for a hard pack right on the jaw. Yowza! Now, that's pain. So come hell or high water, I'm taking care of this tooth tomorrow. I don't care if I have to tell them to pull the fucking thing.
All in all a good day. Just missing friends, and I know I'm not the only one. I'd received a text from a friend tonight talking about how she misses our WRG friends, and thinks we are nuts that we've moved so far from everyone. You know what, I think she's right.
Hopefully tomorrow will be good all around. I'm looking forward to some healthy eating (if my mouth allows actual eating). I hope you guys have a great Monday. Kind of an oxymoron, right? Anyway, I know it's possible. God has blessed us with living in this amazing country, and has allowed a roof over our head and food in our bellies. Hopefully, we will honor him by putting the right kind in us :)
Much love,
Jen
I spent the rest of the day, either being lazy and watching football, or cleaning and doing laundry. It was fairly relaxing. I really wanted to take it easy, as my mouth has been killing me. I have a dentist appt. in the morning. I wanted to wait until Jan., so I would have full benefits, but there's no way I can take it anymore. My jaw is throbbing, and I can't eat on that side. It's been bugging me for a few months, but I knew how expensive it was going to be, so I tried to put it off. Turns out that was a dumb ass move.
Tonight I'm missing my friends in a big way. Again, it's just come out of nowhere. Life has/is been so good. I don't know. I just wish I could hang out with some of them, and b.s. about nothing of any importance. I also wish that I had more confidence in some friendships. As try as I might, I'm afraid that some will never be the same. I know it happens in every relationship, but it really saddens me. All relationships have ups and downs....I just wish I could ride out the waves more easily. Anyway, it's not something I'd been really thinking about lately, but tonight it's kind of hit me. Maybe it's all of the pain my mouth is in. Hard to think about good things, when it hurts to even smile. Or, God forbid, when Brian thought he was being cute and went in for a hard pack right on the jaw. Yowza! Now, that's pain. So come hell or high water, I'm taking care of this tooth tomorrow. I don't care if I have to tell them to pull the fucking thing.
All in all a good day. Just missing friends, and I know I'm not the only one. I'd received a text from a friend tonight talking about how she misses our WRG friends, and thinks we are nuts that we've moved so far from everyone. You know what, I think she's right.
Hopefully tomorrow will be good all around. I'm looking forward to some healthy eating (if my mouth allows actual eating). I hope you guys have a great Monday. Kind of an oxymoron, right? Anyway, I know it's possible. God has blessed us with living in this amazing country, and has allowed a roof over our head and food in our bellies. Hopefully, we will honor him by putting the right kind in us :)
Much love,
Jen
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