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Diariesofafatass.com

Back to life, back to reality.

9/19/2016

4 Comments

 
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Congratulations. You made it through Monday. Look, I know there's a good chance that the day left you bruised, battered, pondering another career choice, cursing under your breath, but that's beside the point...you made it. I made it. Good for us!

First, I must tell you the Dixie Chicks were once again fantastic. I won't lie, and tell you that I liked them as much as the first time. But the first time I was smart...I was careful with how much I drank before the show. Trust me, there's nothing I like more than a pre-show buzz, but history has taught me, that to really enjoy the show, there has to be restraint. That restraint went out the window before this show. Actually, to be precise, it was the day before when my 22 y/o friend (one of the gals that went with us) told me she was worried I was going to be lame after the show, because as she put it, "you're old." Ah nuts...well, I partied like it was 1990 (mixing everything under the sun), and I drank way more than I would like before a show. I hung with the kids, but it did take away from the show a bit. I still had a blast, though. It was a really fun group of girls, that I'd go to any concert with. I just wish I could have experienced the music more than I did. Thank goodness I'd already seen the DCX this tour. Okay, confession, I went back to delete this paragraph....but it's me...my lack of self-control is an equal opportunist, but as we know that lack of self-control when it comes to food is still the big winner. Here I am...yet again, painting myself in the best light possible ;)

Back to Monday... The morning did not start great, as the fifteen year old woke up with an attitude. I knew it was going to be a rough day, as we had a really long day yesterday. It was a great day with the family, going to a Cubs game, but we were gone 13 hours and got home after bedtime. Btw...do you like how I referred to Ryne as, "the fifteen year old"? I think it might be a new thing. I think of him more as a teenager, than by his name, these days. He's been trying my patience, I'll say that. So, the morning was rough, as me telling him to take a "quick shower" meant something altogether different than what I had in mind...The boy was in there 20 minutes, and that's with me yelling at him every 5 minutes. From there, it just got worse. It ended with me being a couple of minutes late for work (I drop him off at Drivers Ed in the morning). So, coming into tonight, he really needed to work hard to make amends. Again, we think differently. I told him to put the dishes away. He went into the kitchen for not long and then said he was going to take a shower. I asked if he put the dishes away..to which he responds...what dishes, like in the dishwasher? He then goes back into the kitchen and proceeds to supposedly put the dishes away. I'm in the middle of making dinner, and I was looking for a certain pot...which you guessed it...was in the dishwasher along with other dishes. He put part of them away...and then argued with me that he'd done them all...until he opened the dishwasher to see what he'd left. Sometimes, I just have to throw my hands in the air. (And I know you're thinking and wave 'em like you just don't care, but that's not the case). I really don't have a hold on this parenting a teenager thing. It feels as if I'm failing at every turn.

I've been thinking a lot lately about something the bff said to me a month or two ago when discussing something kinda deep. She said, "that's not real." She kept going back to it, and she's right: what we were talking about isn't real. But it has me thinking about most everything in my life. Nothing feels real. Am I the only one who feels like this? I've never thought in these terms before, but it makes sense to me now. My career doesn't feel real, mothering doesn't feel real, as I always feel like I'm falling down...on and on... It's all so funny to me, because at the same time, I feel like nothing is real, everything feels all too real. Again, thinking about deleting this...but then you would miss out on all of this uplifting stuff. Maybe I just have a case of the Mondays.  As the Boomtown Rats, sang, I Don't Like Mondays. 


I hope your evening finds you on the winning end of your fantasy football game, or in the middle of a good book, or spending great time with friends or family. Or maybe...just maybe you found yourself eating dinner by yourself at the dinner table, and loving every minute of it.  Yep, just like Loverboy sang. Oh, and I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the thing that made me even happier than dinner (I know it makes me sound terrible, but I really love alone time, sometimes)...but I walked into my bathroom to find the smell of the new homemade blueberry soap I bought this weekend encompassing the room. Ah, heaven.

In honor of mentioning the bff and in honor of Le Ann's birthday, I'll leave you with a little No Doubt. Enjoy.

Jen

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4 Comments
Staci
9/19/2016 06:31:58 pm

Love your posts! We went through that with my kid about 2 years ago...15 is a great age, NOT! My husband really struggled. I had him read, "Unhappy Teenagers" by William Glasser, a book that was required reading in one of my M.Ed classes. This really helped him be a more understanding parent that Connor didn't hate. It's a quick read. Good luck, lol!

Reply
Jen
9/19/2016 06:34:56 pm

Thanks for reading Staci! I will definitely check out that book, because I'm at a loss these days. Thanks for the recommendation. Have a great week.

Jen

Reply
Asha
9/19/2016 08:44:21 pm

Hey you! Love this post! The 15 year old is acting quite normal I'd say. You just stick you your guns, make sure there are consequences for shitty behavior, and make sure to tel him you love him.

I don't feel like anything is real, like I text you earlier. I'm about to be alone, and it doesn't feel real. My kiddos are adults, it doesn't feel real. I've just gotten out of a relationship that I believed was "it" and what it was was a lie, I wish it wasn't real, but FUCK! I could go on and on.

You are an amazing mama, friend, wife, writer.....everything about you is wonderful! Try not to be so hard on yourself. We women do that way too much. I probably need to walk my talk, but I suck at that. lol

I love you girl!!! I'm grateful for such a wonderful friend!!

Reply
Jen
9/20/2016 07:26:07 am

Ah Ash, you make my cry. I'm sorry everything is such a whirlwind for you right now. Thank God we have the strong friendships like we do (including with one another). I'll always be here for you Lady. Love ya.

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    Jen

    Age 47
    Married 24 years
    2 boys, 18 & 15
    email: diariesofafatass@gmail.com


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