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Diariesofafatass.com

Anxiety Girl!

11/6/2013

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Picture
Today is a tough one.  Ugh...  Big time frustrations with just about everything.  Today is totally on par with my terrible habit of going "all or nothing."  I'm feeling like a terrible parent with Ryno.  I love that kid with all my heart, but he pushes my buttons....I mean all of them sometimes.  I need to find a way to get through to that kid...
I'm sure I won't though.  I've never been able to get through to my own husband when it comes to cleaning up after himself.  21 years of frustration right there.  Trust me...if he's cleaning, it's either because we have company coming and I ask him to help, or if he wants to get laid.  He knows that's the easiest way into my pants.  C'mon!  He Knows!  Shouldn't he do it everyday?!  Man, I just want to scream sometimes.

I'm trying real hard to make the most of this day where I just want to bury my head in the sand.  I made myself leave the house and go on my 4 mile walk with Jesse.  Unfortunately, Jesse decided to run after some rabbits and not come back for 10 minutes.  It was getting dark, I mean really dark (at 5:00 what the fuck is up with that?), and I was hustling as we needed to pick Cal up at 5:30.  Also, note to self.: don't walk in the dark in the woods....you twist your knee, you dumb ass.

I also did myself a big favor and chatted online with my good friend, Tami, today.  We used to do it everyday when I worked, but I haven't done much of it out here, until the last week or so.  I'm so blessed to have someone like her in my life.  She really is a great friend.

So, despite waking up on the wrong side of the bed...and it getting worse as the day went on...I'm still trying to make the most of the day.  I just downloaded some new music.  I hadn't done that in quite some time.  Right now, I'm listening to The Monster by Eminem and Rihanna.  Good stuff.

Oh, I also kept my shit together today with regards to my diet.  It's a big victory for me on a day like today.

Alright...I'm calling it an early night.  Hope you all have a great one!

~The Angry Bitchy One   ;)

"Wrecking Ball"  by Miley Cyrus


We
clawed, we chained our hearts in vain
We jumped never asking why
We
kissed, I fell under your spell.
A love no one could deny

Don't you
ever say I just walked away
I will always want you
I can't live a lie,
running for my life
I will always want you

I came in like a wrecking
ball
I never hit so hard in love
All I wanted was to break your
walls
All you ever did was wreck me
Yeah, you, you wreck me

I
put you high up in the sky
And now, you're not coming down
It slowly
turned, you let me burn
And now, we're ashes on the ground

Don't you
ever say I just walked away
I will always want you
I can't live a lie,
running for my life
I will always want you

I came in like a wrecking
ball
I never hit so hard in love
All I wanted was to break your
walls
All you ever did was wreck me

I came in like a wrecking
ball
Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung
Left me crashing in a blazing
fall
All you ever did was wreck me
Yeah, you, you wreck me

I
never meant to start a war
I just wanted you to let me in
And instead of
using force
I guess I should've let you win
I never meant to start a
war
I just wanted you to let me in
I guess I should've let you
win

Don't you ever say I just walked away
I will always want
you

I came in like a wrecking ball
I never hit so hard in love

All I wanted was to break your walls
All you ever did was wreck me

I
came in like a wrecking ball
Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung
Left
me crashing in a blazing fall
All you ever did was wreck me
Yeah, you,
you wreck me
Yeah, you, you wreck me


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    Jen

    Age 47
    Married 24 years
    2 boys, 18 & 15
    email: diariesofafatass@gmail.com


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