I weighed myself today, and I was shocked to see I was at 203. I really thought it would be more. I feel it in my body. My body is definitely changing, for the
worse. I must be losing muscle. Muscle that I worked really hard to get. So, here I am once again. At square one…. I’m going to do my best to get my ass back on track. I had a smoothie this morning. I have been sipping on a Pepsi all morning, but only b/c I’m going to have to wean myself off of the soda/sugar to avoid the nasty headaches, I’m sure to get. I made soup last night, and I packed some fruit for work today. I want to do this. I need to do this….. Eating bad has nasty affects (I never know if I’m using the correct effect/affect) on my life. I know it damages my mental state, my sex life suffers (b/c I don’t want it…and that really sucks), my skin gets bad, and guess what….I now have hemorrhoids. I’m only telling you this as a public service announcement. Eating/drinking poison affects everything, on top of the obvious. So, I’m here to pull my sleeves up and try to start doing the work again. I’ve also decided to follow Amy’s lead and weigh myself on Mondays. I’m going to do it a little different from now on, though. Instead of reporting my weight and loss/gain, I’m going to start with 33 lbs. and count down. My initial goal is 170. I’m sure I won’t be satisfied there, but for me it’s a great number to start with.
We had a really nice Easter. Cal and I drug Brian and Ryne kicking and screaming to church with us (apparently they’re CEO’s- Christmas and Easter Only church goers). Once again, Cal killed it on the singing. Brian and Ryne couldn’t quit laughing. I really want to record it, but I’d feel funny pulling out my cell phone and recording him during a service. Cal singing really is the funniest thing. That poor kid…he got my singing voice, but he does love to sing. Oh, this is funny…they keep trying to talk me into joining the choir. Hahahhahahahahaha. After church, I actually took about a 2 hour nap. It was much needed. I was up really late, and got up too early. We did an Easter egg hunt for the boys. They really had a blast. I love watching them. It’s the cutest thing. I then made a ham dinner for the family (and I must admit….I took a bite of the ham….you know just to make sure it turned out good….) The ham tasted so awesome. It made me miss meat. That is until I had to pull the leftovers off the bone. It made me sick. I kept thinking about the poor pig, and how I was pulling it apart like that. My moment of missing meat, has passed. After Brian and I got the house cleaned up after dinner, I made some soup. It’s been a while since I did that, and it felt good. I loved working with
clean foods again. I ended the night w/ some wine and time alone w/ Brian. It was a good day. Much needed.
So, this was pretty funny....I brought in some cauliflower soup today for lunch, and I was getting funny looks from the Maintenance guys that were in the break room. I was so excited that my boss wanted to try it. We were heating it up in the microwave, and one of the guys took the leftovers and stuck the lid on and sealed it shut. They were disgusted by the smell and the look. It's like when those guys from Laos (I know I butchered that, but I don't have spell check for the blog on this computer) would heat up fish in the microwave at Landa. It made me want to puke. That's how those guys looked today, nearly green in the face. WTF? I think it smells awesome. I love the smell of the spices :) P.S. my boss really liked it. One step toward on convert? I doubt it, but if I can influence anyone into a healthier lifestyle, I'm all for it. Oh, hold on, while I take another sip of my wine.
I was pretty hungry when I got home from work this afternoon. I haven't eaten a lot tonight, but I haven't eaten real smart, either. I've got to get the groove back. But I must tell you, I'm stoked about the day in general. It's the best I've eaten in 3 weeks, by a mile (that's how bad it's been). Apparently, my diet of many Pepsi's, maybe a Suzi Q here and there, and fried food is gone.... By God I hope so. It's like I'm two people, Jeckyl and Hyde when it comes to eating. Well, I don't know which is the good one, Jeckly or Hyde, but I want to be the good one.
Much love to you my friends. You have no idea how happy I am that you stick with me, through all of my many ups and downs.
Jen
Food:
6:00 Smoothie (water, spinach, banana, blueberries)
6:30 Can of Pepsi
8:50 Pear
11:45 Bowl of Cauliflower Soup (see recipe), Soda Water
1:30 20 oz. Diet Coke...the headache was starting...., and a 90 Cal Raisin Granola Bar (totally processed, but I must admit, probably healthier than a pkg of Suzi Q's)
4:50 Bowl of Cinnamon Life cereal w/ Soy Milk
5:30 4 bites of leftover scalloped potatoes
8:00 Thoroughly enjoying my second glass of red. I mean, I can't possibly pour out my Easter wine can I? It's the good stuff... $10 big bottle from Costco. They don't carry the Wicked, liked I loved in the 'Couv, but this essentially tastes the same. And call me crazy, but I equate the taste of this wine with L.P. We loved to put away those bottles of Wicked from time to time.