It is a dreary day out there in the Midwest. We had a beautiful weekend, so I guess I can’t complain. Last week was quite cold with heavy frost on the grass in the mornings. It is a sign of what’s to come, and I am not ready for it. It is as if I blinked and the summer was over. Big sigh. I guess we all feel that way.
I’ve been continuing to make good food choices, for the most part. If I splurge, I account for it. It is nice to be in the land of the living again – actually being accountable for what I’m doing to my body. Often times, it is not easy. It is hard to be around pot-lucks or sweets on the table at work – and of course at home. Some days I’m hardly phased by it all, while others, I feel like I’m wasting away to 90 pounds, so hungry. I’m trying to learn the balance and to understand why some days are so much harder than others.
A couple of weeks ago, my physical therapy was extended. The side effects of Thoracic Outlet Syndrome are improving. I know p/t helps, but at the same time – it is expensive, time consuming, and it is hard to be faced with the realities of the situation all of the time. I hoped I’d “graduate,” but I knew better and saved points, so I could drink wine that night. There are the obvious days like this, when I know why things are harder. I am working on balance in these instances. I’m far from perfect and am working on being forgiving of myself in these instances.
My last official weigh in was 2 Saturdays ago. I was down 2 pounds, bringing my total to 14 ½ pounds. I’m really happy with the progress so far.
I was not able to weigh in this weekend, as we had to leave the house before 6 AM both days and spend the day at swim meet in another town. I knew I couldn’t weigh in, so it was definitely in my mind – to not use this as an excuse to over eat. We are hopefully at the end of what has been the most expensive couple of months of my life – ending Friday with having to replace a vehicle, which broke my heart. Some of the major expenses were planned for, some not enough, and others came out of left field. It is overwhelming to think of it all, but I’m really, really hoping – this run is over. Not over eating during all of this, has also been difficult. Still, my focus is on hitting my WW points each week and hoping to see results from it. I don’t think I did anything differently than I would have if I did have a weigh in. For me, this is definite progress.
I tried on a pair of my old fat pants, that I could no longer fit into – a couple weeks ago. I still couldn’t get into them then, but I am wearing them today 😊 I needed this. The numbers are too much to think of as a whole. I’m so grateful for today to help keep me focused. Here's to those NSVs (non scale victories).
I used my extra WW points on Saturday night, when the hubby and I went to a concert. We shared a hummus plate and guac and chips for dinner. I was fine with the food choices, as we were at a bar, but I used most of my points on wine. I have a very good idea of how many ounces I drank, and it was much more than I planned. The night left me 4 points over for the week. I knew I needed to step up my game yesterday to make up for it. Because we were eating out (swim meet, etc), I hit my points exactly but needed to earn extra points through exercise. I walked the parking lot at Menards in the morning (before meet) and then parking lot at meet (think I get 4 points at 10,000 steps – but it also maxes out at something for the week). I was really active at home with chores, even though I was hella tired (it’s hard to burn the candle at both ends at this age). I looked at my fitbit late in the evening and needed 450 more steps to hit 10,000. I did laundry, cleaned, blah, blah, blah. Looked again at fitbit and was at 9,994. I thought it would be more, but was excited for that thing to buzz when I walked to the room to go to sleep. It didn’t. I thought maybe it needs to refresh or something. I waited and still no buzz. I then did 10 laps inside the house. Still no buzz. I finally figured out the thing had froze (probably 2 or 3 hours earlier). I reset the fitbit and was so tired I just motioned my army up and down 6 times until it buzzed. Idk. I figure someone from above had to be looking down and laughing their ass off at me. I was too tired to laugh last night, but it does make me smile today. Partly because of the craziness of it all but also because the me of a month and a half ago would not have given two shits as to what number was on that fitbit.
I hope today find you kicking ass and taking names – or at least getting through Monday.
~Jen
Here's to getting our exercise in and honoring one of my favorites - forever. Truly.